How to properly communicate as a teacher with parents of preschoolers, from personal experience

Hello, my dear reader! You have come to this article and I am incredibly glad to be useful to you.

Being a professional in the field of pedagogy, I also had the opportunity to work with preschool children, where I successfully implemented my upbringing and education projects based on building trusting relationships and moral education based on the history of our ancestors.

Every teacher knows how difficult it is sometimes to interact with the parents of children they already love. Undoubtedly, they are more concerned about teaching and raising their children, but, unfortunately, most of their time is spent on obtaining funds for living, for material comfort, and for educating their children.

I want to share my experience of how I reoriented my parents’ priorities from routine work to active life in a group, and my children helped me with this. Of course, this did not reduce the routine, but our life in the group as a single family became a priority in the life of each family.

This revelation may be useful not only for educators, but also for parents, and may even be more relevant. Because the mental satisfaction of parents depends on the well-being of their children. Therefore, I put first the general task of how to make a child happy.

Surely this is true? The heart of every parent is concerned with the happiness of their child.

Good trusting relationships are the key to solving problems

When these “little ones” were entrusted to me, I suddenly realized that I had touched an amazing and not simple world: each family is an individual way of life and lifestyle, each of its representatives has its own character, its own desires, its own interests; Every baby is an extraordinary personality, not yet knowing the rules of life, but also with his own character, interests, and desires.

It was very important to understand this in order to build good, trusting relationships with close relatives who are connected by one goal, one most cherished dream: to make the child happy. This was precisely the primary task in the work.

To solve this problem, it was necessary to move away from standard communication with parents, from the “educator-parent” behavior model and take the position: “I am an ASSISTANT in the formation and development of a responsible, highly moral, proactive and creative person with an active life position, in painstakingly fine honing honest, fair, cheerful, multifaceted personality.”

We can make a child happy

At the very first meeting, I told about myself and asked my parents to accept me into their family, because we will solve the common problem: how to make the child happy, we will solve together. Note: it’s not how to raise a child correctly, but how to make him happy. It is very important to think through every word, every phrase, so that people see and feel sincere good participation in their interests.

What can make our child happy? With a simple question, I encouraged parents to delve into it: “What makes US happy?” Oh, what a passionate discussion it was. We went through all the options for happiness. To everyone’s surprise, they came to the conclusion that it turned out to be neither a car, nor an apartment, nor financial well-being, etc. It seems like a simple question, everything is clear.

It's like the sun is shining. Well, we know what the Sun is, no surprise. Sun and Sun. But when we focus our attention on the Sun, then we begin to understand the beauty, the joy emanating from It, the warmth and what it means for life.

With the next question, I again immersed my parents in their personal experience: “Who do we want to communicate with most, to whom are we most drawn, for what kind of person DO we WANT to do something good?” (Long pause to think about the question and start a discussion. If you speak up and answer yourself, it means you’ve lost and you won’t get the expected result).

We drew the conclusion ourselves: We, personally, are attracted to people who are beautiful, smart, cultured, and delicate. Well-built relationships are the basis for external and internal well-being. This is how the first steps in the formation of an attractive personality took shape.

How children helped me raise my parents

And the everyday, unnoticed work of creating our large family began. Work began on honing each personality: developing self-service skills, independence, and various behavioral models. She gave the children maximum independence in all aspects of life in the group, using volitional efforts.

Naturally, difficulties began: everything that I taught the children in kindergarten was often lost at home in the family. Some parents didn't hear me. For example, when getting dressed for a walk, I just checked how the child was dressed and, naturally, tied the laces that were so difficult for them; the children did everything else themselves, even fastening the buttons TOGETHER, not me.

But in the morning I watch a picture of how parents, hurrying to work, quickly undress their child, doing all his work for him. My requests not to deprive the child of independence did not always find a response. Then I decided to influence parents through their children.

I encouraged the child to be independent by reminding him of how he had grown, how big he had become, and had learned a lot compared to the dolls from the nursery group. “Don’t let your mother dress you, say: Mom, I’m already big, I can do it myself.” What does it have to do with it, she said it right there in the presence of her parents. And the child immediately took the initiative into his own hands. So the guys and I weaned all parents from doing different things for them - their children.

And there are many similar examples where the GUYS HELPED me “work with parents.” At the next meeting, we talked for a long time about how to immerse ourselves in the world of a child in order to become a friend, ally for him, about the two-faced love of parents for their child.

“Communication between the teacher and the parents of the students” consultation on the topic

Consultation for teachers

“Communication between the teacher and the parents of the students”

It has long been a common phrase in pedagogical circles: “It is not as difficult to work with children as it is difficult to communicate with their parents.” Almost every teacher has a lot of examples of how difficult it can be to achieve mutual understanding with parents: someone brushes aside the advice of the teacher - “We gave them to you, you educate them”, someone avoids parent-teacher meetings, others begin to blame the teacher for everything that arises. problems, etc. Therefore, it is important for a teacher to know the structure, communication styles, and be able to find a way out of conflict situations. In teaching practice, communication is the most important factor in professional success. According to M.I. Skatkina “High technique of pedagogical communication is not only one of the components, but also the leading component of pedagogical skill.”

Let's use our imagination for a moment and imagine... In the morning, mothers and fathers bring their children to kindergarten and politely say: “Hello!” - and leave. Children spend the whole day in kindergarten: playing, walking, studying... And in the evening, parents come and, saying: “Goodbye!”, take the children home. Teachers and parents do not communicate, do not discuss the children’s successes and the difficulties they experience, do not find out how the child lives, what interests him, makes him happy, or upsets him. And if questions suddenly arise, parents can say that there was a survey and we talked about everything there. And the teachers will answer them like this: “After all, there are information stands. Read it, it says it all!” Agree, the picture turned out to be bleak...

Yes, in fact, there are many difficulties in organizing communication: this includes parents’ lack of understanding of the importance of the kindergarten regime, and its constant violation, the lack of unity of requirements in the family and kindergarten. It is difficult to communicate with young parents, as well as with parents from dysfunctional families or those with personal problems. They often treat teachers condescendingly and dismissively; it is difficult to establish contact with them, establish cooperation, and become partners in the common cause of raising a child. But many of them would like to communicate with teachers “on an equal footing,” as with colleagues, to achieve trusting, “heartfelt” communication.

What makes up successful communication? This is the desire to make contact, establish relationships, help each other, see the other as an equal partner, hear him, recognize the other’s right to a different position and understand this position. Communication will be successful if it is meaningful, based on common and significant topics for both parties, if each of them enriches its information baggage in the process of communication.

Who plays the leading role in organizing communication? Of course to the teacher. To build it, it is important to have communication skills, navigate the problems of education and the needs of the family, and be aware of the latest achievements of science. The teacher must make parents feel competent and interested in the successful development of the child, show parents that he sees them as partners and like-minded people.

All this leads us to the concept of “professional competence of a teacher in the field of communication with parents of students.” Which teacher can be called competent in the field of communication with parents?

Personal qualities and attitudes (personal component)

Willingness for continuous professional development in the field of communication with parents of students
Awareness of one’s own mistakes and difficulties in organizing communication with parents
Setting up a trusting and non-judgmental interaction with parents
Self-control, tact, observation, respect

Knowledge (content component)

about family
about the characteristics of family education
about the specifics of interaction between public and family education
about family study methods
about modern forms of communication organization
about methods of activating parents

Skills and abilities (activity component)

Ability to overcome psychological barriers to communication
Knowledge of family study methods
The ability to predict the results of child development in the family
Ability to navigate information
Ability to design an activity program with parents
Ability to organize traditional and non-traditional forms of communication with parents
Communication skills: establish contact with parents, understand them, empathize with them; anticipate the results of communication; manage your behavior; be flexible in communicating with parents; master etiquette norms of speech and behavior.

Let’s “draw” a portrait of a teacher with a high level of professional competence in the field of communication with parents of students.

Portrait of a teacher

Has a strong need for self-improvement in the area of communication with parents
Recognizes the leading role of parents in raising children and the role of the teacher as their “assistant”
Strives for active and meaningful communication with parents in order to assist them in raising their children
Has a high degree of dialogue in communication with parents.
When communicating with parents, he shows attention, restraint, tact, and other professionally significant qualities.
Has knowledge about the family, the specifics of family education, methods of studying the family and the educational needs of parents.
Takes into account the social needs of parents (interests, educational needs) when organizing communication with them.
Knows how to plan upcoming communication: select the necessary information, traditional and non-traditional forms of organizing communication and methods of activating parents.
Has developed communication skills.

A teacher who is competent in the field of communication with parents understands why communication is needed and what it should be, knows what is necessary for communication to be interesting and meaningful, and, most importantly, actively acts.

The conclusion is clear: teachers need to constantly work on their professional competence in communicating with parents. Let's look at a sample code of communication

Always strive to be in a good mood and be pleasant to talk to.
Try to feel the emotional state of the parents.
Finding an opportunity to tell parents something positive about the child every time is the best way to win parents over.
Give parents the opportunity to speak without interrupting them.
Be emotionally balanced when communicating with parents, set an example of good manners and tact.
In a difficult situation, try to set an example of compliance - this cannot damage your dignity, but you can strengthen it

Psychologists distinguish three components of communication:

The first component includes the perception of a person by a person in the process of communication.
The second component is the process of transmitting information: the exchange of opinions, information, desires - this is what we say.
The third component involves the organization of joint activities, interaction in conversation (how we speak, what goals we pursue), which can be expressed in pressure, avoidance, or passivity of one of the partners.

Speaking about communication, it is necessary to pay attention to the teacher’s self-presentation. We have not yet had time to say anything, but an opinion about us has already been formed, in accordance with the impression we made on the interlocutor. Our appearance: clothes, hairstyle, gait and much more told our parents in what manner to communicate with us. Therefore, it is very important for a teacher to present himself: to be neatly dressed, in clean shoes, so that they are shoes and not soft slippers without backs. After all, parents, like teachers, “read” information from his external appearance and adapt to a certain state of the interlocutor. At this time, the teacher can grasp the parent’s mood, attitude towards himself, find the right tone, and create an atmosphere of business interaction. As a rule, teachers at school take their appearance quite seriously, but for some reason kindergarten teachers believe that there is no point in trying to look good and be neat, since children are too small and do not understand anything. Unfortunately, this is an erroneous opinion; it is the kindergarten workers who should pay special attention to their appearance, which is one of the factors in the formation of the child’s internal culture.

The next stage of communication is verbal communication. Pedagogical practice shows that an incorrectly structured speech message can lead to both partners’ misunderstanding of each other and to open conflict. V.N. Kunitsina, in her book “Interpersonal Communication,” gives the principles of constructing verbal communication. They can be presented in the form of a diagram.

Principles of communication

The effectiveness and success of communication between the teacher and parents will also depend on the style of communication.

The first experimental study of communication styles was conducted in 1938 by German psychologist Kurt Lewin. In this work, he points out that each person has his own, characteristic only for him, style of communicating with people. It changes somewhat depending on the partner and the nature of the activity, but at the same time maintaining its essential features and its uniqueness. The style of communication reflects the specifics of relationships between people, the diverse and at the same time unique essence of the individuals included in the dialogue.

Nowadays, there are many communication styles, we will focus on the main ones:

Collaborative creativity

The basis of joint creativity is the unity of the teacher’s high professionalism and his ethical principles. The activity-dialogue scheme of this communication puts the teacher and parent in a position of parity when common goals are set and solutions are found through joint efforts. In this style, as on photographic film, all the personal qualities of both parties are revealed. Passion for a common cause is a source of friendliness, and at the same time, friendliness, multiplied by interest, gives rise to a joint, enthusiastic search.

Authoritarian style

According to the authoritarian style, the teacher makes all decisions individually, gives orders, and gives instructions. With an authoritarian communication style, decisions are made by the teacher and given to parents in the form of directives, which is why this style is often called directive. In this case, according to the teacher, his directives are not subject to discussion, they must be undeniably followed.

Permissive style

A characteristic feature of the permissive communication style is the teacher’s insignificant activity; problems with parents are discussed formally. The teacher is subject to various influences, does not show initiative in joint activities with parents, and is often unwilling or unable to make decisions himself, limiting himself to formally fulfilling the duties and instructions of the administration.

Style - distance

Without maintaining distance, pedagogical communication can slide into familiar and condescending relationships. Distance acts as an indicator of the leading role of the teacher. The popularity of this communication style lies in the fact that novice teachers often believe that distance communication helps them immediately establish themselves as a teacher, and therefore they use this style to a certain extent as a means of self-affirmation. But, the use of this style of communication, in most cases, leads to pedagogical failures, so you should choose a reasonable range of its application. Communication - distance is to a certain extent a transitional stage to such a negative form of communication as intimidating communication.

Style is intimidating

This style artificially puts the partner in a dependent position, causing him to have a negative attitude towards the opposite party. The communication process turns out to be strictly regulated, driven into a formal and official framework. An invisible barrier of alienation is erected between those communicating.

Style - flirting

Essentially, the type of communication-flirting corresponds to the desire to gain false, cheap authority from parents, which contradicts the requirements of pedagogical ethics. It is often used by young teachers to quickly establish contact with parents and get them to like them; this is caused by the lack of the necessary general pedagogical and communicative culture, pedagogical communication skills and experience, and experience in professional communicative activities.

Mentor style

The mentoring style of communication appears when one of the partners (most often this is a person who considers himself an “experienced” person) voluntarily or unintentionally takes on the role of a mentor. An edifying and patronizing tone is present not only in the dialogue, but also in its entire appearance.

According to G.B. Monina, an effective communication technique is to use the “lawyer” and “prosecutor” styles.

Any professional activity that is carried out over a long period of time leaves an imprint on the development of personal qualities. In addition to the positive qualities that teachers develop, some negative ones should also be noted. For example, experienced teachers often complain that they develop a special way of communicating with others, that they begin to view the world from the perspective of “good” and “bad”, “right” and “wrong”, as a result of which a certain degree of confusion appears in their judgments. categoricalness. This categoricalness does not contribute to the formation of a friendly atmosphere, since, firstly, the interlocutor is afraid to openly state his position, and secondly, negative information about the child, about his behavior, expressed in a categorical style, is often perceived by parents painfully or sometimes even with aggression . This position of the teacher can be attributed to the “prosecutor” style, since here one of the main goals of the teacher is to accuse (the child or his parents).

The opposite of the “prosecutor” style, the “lawyer” style implies the teacher’s protection of the child (or his parents).

It is recommended that the teacher use the “lawyer” style when communicating with parents in the following cases:

parents ask for advice, seek help, share their problems, take an interest in the child’s behavior and success;
parents place excessive demands on the child and expect too high results from him;
The teacher is required to provide negative information about the child. You can start the conversation from a “lawyer” position, telling the good things about the child, and then move on to the unpleasant moments

When talking about a child’s problems, a teacher can speak from the position of his defender—a person who sincerely wants to help both the child and the parents. The main thing in the “lawyer” position is not to blame, but to find a way out of the current situation. The lawyer style is easier to use in narrative form, and many educators use it with success.

Conflicts between parents and teachers in kindergarten

The reasons can be both objective and subjective.

Objective reasons are the teacher’s dishonest attitude towards work. The best way out of the situation is to take the child and find another kindergarten.

Subjective reasons take place both on the part of educators and on the part of parents. These include unjustifiably positive or unjustifiably negative emotions from the kindergarten.

Unjustifiably positive emotions arise if parents are convinced that kindergarten will teach their child everything. If these expectations are not met, then tension arises between educators and parents. It is important to understand that kindergarten does a lot for the development of children. But he cannot replace the child’s parents and their educational influence.

An unjustifiably negative attitude towards kindergarten arises when parents themselves have not attended a preschool institution, but have heard a lot of bad things about it.

Another subjective reason for conflicts in kindergarten is that for many parents the teacher is a symbol of power who teaches them. When a teacher gives recommendations to parents, they believe that the teacher is evaluating them. This is a misconception that leads to misunderstanding and conflict.

What can most often become a reason for misunderstanding and dissatisfaction?

From the parents' side it is:

There is little activity with the child in the garden;
do not create the proper conditions to strengthen his health, walk too little (or too much), do not ventilate the group or ventilate the group too often, dress too lightly (warmly);
cannot find an approach to the child;
use non-pedagogical methods in relation to the child (moral and physical punishment);
they don’t look after the child well (they didn’t wipe their sniffles, didn’t immediately change their panties, didn’t change their dirty T-shirt);
the child is forced to eat or, conversely, they do not make sure that he eats everything;
restrict the child’s freedom (one mother complained to me that her child was forced to lie in the crib during quiet time; she thought that teachers should just play with the child since he did not want to sleep);
they often punish and complain about the child if his behavior does not suit the teachers;
they do not take action against hyperactive and aggressive children, especially if their child has been bitten (which often happens in nurseries), hit, or scratched.

Of course, educators also have their own list of complaints against parents:

treat the kindergarten staff with disrespect and may reprimand them in a raised voice in front of the child;
they forget to pay receipts or pay fees for additional classes on time;
they forget to put a change of clothes in the children’s locker;
children are brought to kindergarten completely unprepared (without basic self-care skills, not accustomed to the kindergarten’s daily routine);
children are picked up late;
they raise their children poorly (they pamper them excessively or, conversely, do not pay enough attention to the child; usually it is very difficult to find an approach to such children);
make unreasonable claims to the staff, find fault with little things.

The most effective way to resolve conflicts between a teacher and a parent is the good work of the teacher. If he really works with his soul, is passionate about it, and “burns” at work, then his parents forgive him a lot. Such a teacher, as a rule, does not have conflicts at all. However, in most cases, conflicts still occur. But they can be minimized!

To educators:

inform parents of what will happen in kindergarten and group, not only in terms of schedules and routines, but also in terms of relationships and pedagogical influences.
show parents how to “painlessly” resolve conflicts if they arise. In addition to the parental agreement, you can create a special memo that will spell out the rules of behavior in a conflict situation.
competently convey information to parents. For example, when reporting something negative about a child, always start with a positive review and only then formulate the problem.
the teacher's use of various forms and methods in working with parents

(conversations and consultations with a psychologist, questionnaires, open days and much more).

To parents:

Parents, first of all, need to remember that kindergarten is not a substitute for parental education.
Parents must understand that the behavior of a child who enters kindergarten changes dramatically.
Parents should also learn to convey information to educators in a non-conflict form.

The problem of conflict between parents and teachers is a global problem of society as a whole, the education system itself. There are also many subjective reasons that, even with a very good teacher and a wonderful kindergarten structure, give rise to difficult relationships. But, fortunately, most parents and educators understand that the only correct and best way out is not continuous confrontation or passive inaction, but serious and thoughtful cooperation. Listening to each other and acting together is not easy work, but it is fully rewarded by the harmonious development and happiness of our children.

The principles of interaction with parents are:

Friendly style of communication between teachers and parents

A positive attitude towards communication is the solid foundation on which all the work of the group’s teachers with parents is built. In communication between a teacher and parents, categoricality and a demanding tone are inappropriate. After all, any model of interaction with the family perfectly built by the kindergarten administration will remain a “model on paper” if the teacher does not develop for himself specific forms of correct treatment with parents. The teacher communicates with parents every day, and it depends on him what the family’s attitude towards the kindergarten as a whole will be. Daily friendly interaction between teachers and parents means much more than a single well-executed event.

Individual approach

It is necessary not only when working with children, but also when working with parents. The teacher, when communicating with parents, must feel the situation, the mood of mom or dad. This is where the teacher’s human and pedagogical ability to reassure the parent, sympathize and think together about how to help the child in a given situation comes in handy.

Collaboration, not mentoring

Modern mothers and fathers, for the most part, are literate, knowledgeable people and, of course, well aware of how they should raise their own children. Therefore, the position of instruction and simple propaganda of pedagogical knowledge today is unlikely to bring positive results. It will be much more effective to create an atmosphere of mutual assistance and support for the family in difficult pedagogical situations, to demonstrate the interest of the kindergarten staff in understanding the family’s problems and a sincere desire to help.

Getting ready seriously

Any event, even the smallest one, to work with parents must be carefully and seriously prepared. The main thing in this work is the quality, not the quantity of individual, unrelated events. A weak, poorly prepared parent meeting or seminar can negatively impact the positive image of the institution as a whole.

Dynamism

A kindergarten today should be in development mode, not functioning, be a mobile system, and quickly respond to changes in the social composition of parents, their educational needs and educational requests. Depending on this, the forms and directions of work of the kindergarten with the family should change.

DEAR TEACHERS, REMEMBER:

Don't make judgments. The teacher needs to avoid judgments like “You spend too little time raising your son (daughter),” since these phrases (even if they are absolutely fair) most often give rise to protest from parents.
Don't lecture. Don't suggest solutions. You cannot impose your own point of view on your interlocutor and “teach life” to your parents, since the phrases “If I were you, I would...” and the like infringe on the interlocutor’s self-esteem and do not contribute to the communication process.
Don't make a "diagnosis". It must be remembered that all the teacher’s phrases must be correct. Categorical statements - “Your child does not know how to behave”, “You need to contact a psychologist about deviations in the behavior of your son (daughter)” always put parents on guard and set them against you.
Don't pry. You cannot ask parents questions that are not related to the pedagogical process, since excessive curiosity destroys mutual understanding between the family and the kindergarten.
Don't give away the "secret". The teacher is obliged to keep secret information about the family entrusted to him by the parents, if they do not want this information to become public.
Don't provoke conflicts. The teacher will avoid conflict situations in communication with parents if he follows all the above rules for communication with parents.

How we lose the happiness and well-being of our children in the pursuit of material wealth

They talked a lot about how in the endless bustle of everyday life, in the pursuit of material wealth, we lose the most important thing in our lives - the happiness and well-being of our children. I asked them: “When was the last time you saw the sunrise, when you stopped to look at the droplets of emerald dew on the leaves, when you sat down in the grass to hear the birds singing, look at their life, look at the sky, the floating clouds?”

Having immersed myself in personal experience, the majority of parents, I am sure, judging by their statements, have come to understand how much we miss in life in pursuit of everyday comfort. “What kind of happiness can we give to our child if we earn money from morning to evening?” money?

Of course, clothing and feeding are important. But does this make a person happy: food, clothes? Do material wealth bring happiness? You and I are dressed and well-fed, but are we all happy? Something constantly bothers us, throws us off balance.” (I wanted to convince you of the importance of taking maximum participation in the personal inner life of the child).

I urged my parents to stop, step away from the daily hustle and bustle and try to look at their lives from an observer’s perspective. Read Dale Carnegie's "Letter from a Father to His Son." Everyone listened very heartfeltly, you could feel your heart being touched. Some asked for the letter to be photocopied to be read at home with the family.

We agreed: at home, everyone will prioritize their lives according to their significance and identify what is most important in their lives.

True parental love

In the first year of working with parents, a big, very significant task became: to bring to the consciousness of parents the difference between true parental love and false love.

Show them with life examples, let them feel for themselves what true love is and what false love is. At one of our meetings, I slowly and expressively read N. Nosov’s story “Cucumbers.” After reading, there was silence. After a pause, she asked the question: “Which of you was able to do the same as the mother of the boy who stole the cucumbers did to her son?”

And again a trembling insight hung in the air. Everyone unanimously admitted that they were not ready to send their son alone at night to return the stolen property. Then we began to look for options: “How else can we correct this situation so that our son grows up to be an honest guy?”

And then a discussion took place again, in which the parents talked to each other, and I watched and listened, getting to know them more and more. They independently put forward solutions, immediately refuted them, made new and new conclusions until they came to a consensus.

True parental love is to form real human qualities in a child and strictly follow this course without deviation. And deviations will be false love.

What to do with cucumbers? We decided that we should go with our son and return the cucumbers. Well, since our time now is not so calm.

Selection of communication style between teacher and parents

Aksenova Alexandra

Selection of communication style between teacher and parents

The results of polygamy studies of methods and practices of interaction between family and preschool educational institutions show that properly structured communication and style of relationship is a condition for involving parents in the lives of their children outside the home, which directly has a positive effect on the entire educational and upbringing process.

For the most part, teachers rely on the Methodological Rules for the interaction of an educational institution with families, which, when implemented, really produce results: they ensure that parents are informed about educational plans , conduct joint events (open lessons, holidays, and ensure that the teacher adheres to ethical standards of communication . Methodological rules and existing rules always approach the teacher from the position of “prohibition”

(do not preach, do not teach, do not suggest solutions, do not make judgments, do not justify or make excuses, do not make a “diagnosis”, do not pry, etc., which in turn pushes the
teacher from proactive decisions and the use of non-standard techniques in his work, and it is they, as statistics say, that are most effective in the pedagogical process ...
When choosing a style of communication with parents, one cannot be guided by only one line of behavior, the teacher must find an approach, including based on the characteristics of the interlocutor. A good option is to use different communication styles at group meetings and in personal communication ... In no case should you use the opposite styles of evil and good , it is important to remember that the teacher cannot afford hypocrisy.

Today, psychologists in pedagogical activities identify many styles of interaction between teachers and parents . Let's look at them and determine which styles are best for a teacher to use in his work. It is important to understand that even the most impartial and on the verge of what is permitted style in some cases is exactly what a teacher :

• Collaborative creativity

The style is based on that combines the high professionalism of the teacher and his ethical principles. When interacting, the teacher the parent on an equal footing : common goals and objectives are set, and solutions are achieved. The style reflects the strength of the teacher’s personality and its projection onto the parent .

It is proposed to be used by a teacher with qualifications and experience, in initiative groups, low-conflict groups.

• Style “Authoritarian”

The basis of the style is the rigidity of interaction with parents . All instructions from the teacher are non-negotiable and must be followed. Exclusively sole decision making by the teacher . Strict style , requiring constant availability of a methodological base, rules, plans and instructions.

It is proposed to be used in problem groups, low social groups, and requires constant restraint and control from the teacher .

• “Pacific” style

The style based on the low activity of the teacher , interaction with parents is “for show”

.
The teacher does not show initiative either in working with parents or in making pedagogical decisions , completely following the instructions of the administration, which is reflected in an indifferent position towards innovative projects and activities. Style does not imply serious work and results. A style that involves the need to bide time in unfavorable working conditions.
It can be used in extremely problematic and conflict groups, low support for initiative by management.

• “Flirting” style

The style based on the desire to gain imaginary authority from parents . Such activities of a teacher contradict the norms of professional culture and pedagogical ethics . Young teachers often practice this style in order to instantly establish positive relationships with parents and get them to like them. The use of the style is caused by the lack of a level of pedagogical and psychological culture, knowledge and skills according to the rules of teacher-parent communication , and professional experience.

The use of style is not encouraged . Leads to degradation of relationships with parents and the team , deviation from norms and requirements when performing assigned tasks to please the wishes of parents .

• “Intimidation” style

The style based on artificially placing the opposite side of the interaction in a dependent position, causing him to have a negative attitude towards the opposite side. Interaction is characterized by strictly regulated, driven into a formal and official framework, with established timing and based on strict deadlines. An invisible barrier of alienation is erected between those communicating. The core of style requirements and creation

.
The style uses group interaction between parents as leverage over individual parents . Style presupposes the presence of regulated schedules and plans for teacher-parent , as the basis for demands and intimidation.
The negative style of communication , which can be used in problem groups, groups with low inertia and tone, when interacting with low-social parents , is the dark side of the Distance style .

• Distance style

based on distance , which acts as an indicator of the dominant role of the teacher . The style is a neutral style of interaction , without taking initiatives, but also without neglecting the main tasks of interaction with parents . The style is popular among young teachers as a means of self-affirmation and increasing the authority of the teacher . A low-effective style that requires endurance and effort to maintain a distance in communication . The danger of the style lies in the difficulty of balancing, in which, on the one hand, the style falls apart and slides into a friendly attitude, which leads to failure to complete the assigned tasks, since in such relationships it is difficult to demand results, on the other hand, it leads to self-isolation of the teacher , when parents do not understand the goals tasks or begin to ignore them. Part of the style moves to a communication-intimidation style . The style is characterized by caution in setting tasks, clear requirements and the use of standard schedules.

It is recommended to be used by young teachers without work experience as a basis for developing a methodological base. The characteristics of the group and individual parents are not important .

• “Mentor” style

The style based on a patronizing teacher-parent communication style . When using this style, a combination of mentor and student, supervisor and subordinate is used. The core of style is experience or “legend”

about
the teacher's . The style is supported by prudence, appearance, and often brightly demonstrative elements - stands of success: certificates, gratitude, advanced training, achievements. The style often manifests itself in older teachers teachers prone to narcissism, despite this it is very gently and effectively accepted by parents of standard groups without signs of problems.
It is proposed to be used by teachers with merit and in groups that have developed a respectful attitude towards teachers .

• Style “Lawyer - Prosecutor”

The style based on detailed information to parents about the successes/failures of their children. When using this information, the teacher , based on behavior, results of classes, relationships, can build a communication style aimed at achieving certain results. The danger of the style lies in the difficulty of balancing in which the teacher must clearly maintain the dosage of positive and negative aspects, since there is always a risk of “non-acceptance”

information from
parents , which can lead to conflict. Do not confuse the delivery of information on the successes of children and the style of communication , the goal of which is to achieve goals based on correctly presented information to parents . The style presupposes a good and attentive attitude to everything that happens in the group, recording key moments in the lives of children and parents .
It is proposed to be used by a teacher who has success in psychology, a good memory, in non-conflict groups, with parents of a humanitarian orientation.

The correct selection of style , a combination of styles will not become a panacea for the teacher , will not solve the problem of interaction, but will be one of the tools with which the teacher will be able to solve the problems facing him, namely, building the foundation of the future generation, including through the unit of society - the family of their pupils.

I wasn't being smart, I just became one of them

On any issue or educational task, I did not dominate the conversation, did not play smart, did not give lectures from leading teachers about the correctness of education. I just became one of them.

Everyone knows that well-written questions can steer a discussion in the right direction, so through pre-thought-out questions and immersing parents in the life situation, I involved them in discussions and independent decision-making.

At our meetings, they listened not to the lectures I read, not to me, but to each other, often and extensively expressed their opinions, and summed up the results. I studied their character, attitude towards the child, towards themselves, towards life in general. Step by step we developed good relations among ourselves.

We “didn’t take out trash in public” - we observed human cleanliness

You may have a question: “What did we do if a child exhibited a character trait that brought harm to both the child himself and his environment. Isn’t it a secret that negative social situations regularly arise in the life of a group that cannot be resolved without the participation of parents for educational purposes?”

Of course, life flowed in the group with all its pitfalls, just like in our adult lives. We also tried to solve all negative situations ourselves, which is called not taking out the trash in public. And if the participation of parents was necessary, then only in order to develop the child’s conscience and discomfort from the offense, and only in the most extreme cases.

Every time I tried to speak to everyone in their language. There is no point in saying how badly Sasha or Seryozha behaved today. We must understand: they are SUPPOSED to behave differently from the framework and formulas that adults have prescribed. They are still small and do not know the world of adults and their rules.

Every time I found kind words about the child and his talents. She didn’t sugarcoat, didn’t try to please their ears, didn’t try to please them, she told the truth and only about the good that was in the child.

In a children's society (group), the law is the teacher, and how fair and honest, kind and cheerful the teacher is, depends on the atmosphere of the group and mutual understanding with children and parents.

Experience of remote work on interaction with parents of kindergarten students

Experience of remote work on interaction with parents of kindergarten students

In accordance with the Law of the Russian Federation “On Education” and the standard regulations on a preschool educational institution, the priority task of the work of groups of preschool children is “interaction with the family to ensure the full development of the child.” The problem of interaction between kindergarten and family has always been relevant and difficult. Relevant - because the participation of parents in the lives of their children helps them see a lot, and difficult - because all parents are different, they, like children, need a special approach. Working with parents, we help them see the difference between the world of children and the world of adults, discover the strengths and weaknesses of the child and take them into account in solving educational problems, show sincere interest in the actions of the child and be ready for emotional support.

Considering that parents in modern society do not have extra time, I try to organize the work compact but effective. In my work on interaction with parents of group students, I set the following goals:

Creating conditions for a favorable climate of interaction with parents.
Establishing trusting, partnership relationships with parents.
Involving families in a single educational space.

To achieve the set goals, various face-to-face forms of organizing communication between educators and parents were used in the work:

Traditional (collective: parent meetings, surveys on various issues, etc.; individual: conversations, thematic consultations, etc.; visual and informational: exhibitions, children's works, moving folders, matinees, information stands).
Non-traditional (informational - analytical, leisure, educational, visual and informational).

However, in modern realities, the use of distance educational technologies in preschool educational institutions occupies a special place. Due to the need for distance communication and education, there is a need for regular contact with the families of students via the Internet. Remote forms of cooperation with families significantly expand the possibilities of effective communication with parents and providing them with assistance in matters of development and upbringing of children.

Our group has a closed community on Viber. The decisive factor in his choice was that this platform is the most widespread and easy to use; every family has the opportunity to work on it. Members of the community are teachers and parents of the group. In the community we share various materials that all community members need to see:

Announcements (about holidays, competitions, promotions, etc.).
Congratulations (to competition winners, happy holidays, etc.).
Consultations, reminders for parents.
Presentations (parent meetings, projects).
Matinee video.
Discussions (organizational issues, problem situations, etc.).

After analyzing the work of the community in Viber, I came to the conclusion that this form of work is successfully used by parents and teachers of our group and is suitable for distance communication and learning.

On the recommendation of the teachers, the parents of the pupils in our group actively use the official website of the kindergarten, where they get acquainted with the administrative and legal information of the kindergarten (charter, license, announcements on current issues, etc.). On the institution’s website, parents receive information on issues related to the upbringing and education of their child. Communication with parents through the kindergarten website helps build trust and partnerships and expands the family’s opportunities to receive a quality education.

The group conducts individual work with parents of students via the teacher’s email. The child’s parent has the opportunity to clarify information on any issue of interest thanks to feedback.

In the future, I plan to more actively use remote forms of interaction with parents, including Google Forms and Zoom.

So, the use of remote forms of interaction with parents contributed to the establishment of partnerships with parents and their involvement in the life of the educational organization. Social networks allowed parents to exchange photos and videos, ask questions, comment on information; and educators - to familiarize them with advisory materials and recommendations, and inform them about upcoming events.

Informality strengthens relationships

More and more I realized how important it is to involve parents in the life of the group. After all, most of the time the children were with me, almost their entire adult life took place within the group, and mothers and fathers at home are mainly preoccupied with everyday tasks, from which it is difficult to distract them.

And the children actively helped me solve this problem. The idea came to go out into nature with the whole family on weekends. It was an amazing trip: dads and sons were preparing a fire, mothers and girls were in charge of the kitchen. Absolutely everyone was busy, participating in the common cause.

If any mommy took on the image of a “caring busy mommy” who took the initiative into her own hands, I came to the rescue. At the same time, she did not focus her attention on the incorrectness of her actions.

She simply turned on the proven mechanism of children’s influence on their parents, again turning to the children themselves with a reminder of how big and independent we are, that we need to treat mothers with care and take most of the work on ourselves (I turned the children’s skill of manipulating parents into a positive direction, it came in handy).

Well, after the work was done, all the pleasures were expected: they built a snow fortress, went downhill, played games, and of course a big feast with delicious barbecue. Everyone immediately noticed how much the children were eating (if only it were like that in a kindergarten), everything was eaten.

And the next morning, everyone noted that, having arrived home in the evening, the children were calm, satisfied, tired and simply went to bed earlier than usual. They showed an ardent desire to get together like this and go out of town more often. We immediately planned our next trip in the golden autumn. Only the weather hasn’t been great this fall. Well, we'll figure something out.

Communication between the teacher and the parents of the students

Consultation for teachers

A modern kindergarten helps a prosperous family and in some ways replaces a child with a problematic family. He trains and advises parents, passes on traditions and educates a person of the future. From this point of view, preschool education has much more significance for society than just a place where children are taught and developed.

Working with a family is hard work. It is necessary to take into account the modern approach to working with families. The main trend is to teach parents to independently solve life problems. And this requires certain efforts from teachers. Both the teacher and the parent are adults who have their own psychological characteristics, age and individual characteristics, their own life experience and their own vision of problems.

The main tasks of interaction between the teacher and parents are:

establish partnerships with the family of each student;
join efforts for the development and education of children;
create an atmosphere of mutual understanding, community of interests, emotional mutual support;
activate and enrich the educational skills of parents;
support their confidence in their own teaching capabilities.

The principles of interaction with parents are:

Friendly style of communication between teachers and parents

Individual approach

Collaboration, not mentoring

Getting ready seriously

Dynamism

Dear teachers, remember:

Don't make judgments.
The teacher needs to avoid judgments like “You spend too little time raising your son (daughter),” since these phrases (even if they are absolutely fair) most often give rise to protest from parents.
Don't lecture.
Don't suggest solutions. You cannot impose your own point of view on your interlocutor and “teach life” to your parents, since the phrases “If I were you, I would...” and the like infringe on the interlocutor’s self-esteem and do not contribute to the communication process.
Don't make a "diagnosis".
It must be remembered that all the teacher’s phrases must be correct. Categorical statements - “Your child does not know how to behave”, “You need to contact a psychologist about deviations in the behavior of your son (daughter)” always put parents on guard and set them against you.
Don't pry.
You cannot ask parents questions that are not related to the pedagogical process, since excessive curiosity destroys mutual understanding between the family and the kindergarten.
Don't give away the "secret".
The teacher is obliged to keep secret information about the family entrusted to him by the parents, if they do not want this information to become public.
Don't provoke conflicts.
The teacher will avoid conflict situations in communication with parents if he follows all the above rules for communication with parents.

We wish you good luck in interacting with parents!

Carefully! Book characters, television, and the Internet influence the formation of a child’s qualities

The implementation of the “Revival of Family Reading” project turned out to be a miracle. Considering that books have become less in demand in moral education, priority is given to the TV screen and computer, with which fairy tale characters and cartoon characters often enter a child’s life, not always distinguished by their sincerity or moral purity.

A new idea came up: to make friends with the Children's City Library. It was a godsend for work. Of course, it is extremely difficult to pull parents out of routine housework and involve them in entertainment. As always, parents are busy, but my children are great helpers in this - they gathered all the parents themselves.

The main thing is to motivate the children and tell them “tasty” about the upcoming event. And again, as a united family with moms and dads, we went on an excursion to the library. We were greeted as dear guests. They took us through all the book halls, told us a lot, showed us a lot, everything happened in a playful way.

During a conversation with parents about the importance of reading in the family, children were given complete freedom in the playroom. It was great!!! Upon leaving the library, parents actively expressed agreement with library staff about the importance of getting their children back to reading books and guiding their children in the right direction in using television and computers.

Thus, the first seeds were sown in the minds of parents about the importance of reading books in family life. And our friendship began to flow with the library staff, who only need this - our participation.

Methodology for conducting a conversation with parents

Methodological recommendations for organizing and conducting conversations

This is the most accessible form of establishing communication between a teacher and a family; it can be used either independently or in combination with other forms: conversation when visiting families, at a parent meeting, consultation.

The purpose of a pedagogical conversation is to exchange opinions on a particular issue; to provide parents with timely assistance on a particular issue of education, to help achieve a common point of view on these issues. The leading role here is given to the teacher; he plans the topic and structure of the conversation in advance. When conducting a conversation, it is recommended to choose the most appropriate conditions and start it with neutral questions, then move directly to the main topics. Its peculiarity is the active participation of both the teacher and parents. Conversations can arise spontaneously on the initiative of both parents and teachers. The latter thinks through what questions he will ask the parents, announces the topic and asks them to prepare questions to which they would like to receive an answer. When planning the topics of conversations, we must strive to cover, as far as possible, all aspects of education. As a result of the conversation, parents should gain new knowledge on issues of teaching and raising a preschooler. The conversation begins with general questions; it is imperative to cite facts that positively characterize the child. It is recommended to think through in detail its beginning, on which success and progress depend. The conversation is individual and addressed to specific people. The teacher should select recommendations that are suitable for a given family, create an environment conducive to “pour out” the soul. For example, a teacher wants to find out the features of raising a child in a family. You can start this conversation with a positive characterization of the child, showing, even if insignificant, his successes and achievements. Then you can ask your parents how they managed to achieve positive results in their upbringing. Next, you can tactfully dwell on the problems of raising a child, which, in the teacher’s opinion, still need to be improved. For example: “At the same time, I would like to pay attention to the education of hard work, independence, hardening the child, etc.” Give specific advice. Algorithm for conducting a conversation with parents The preliminary stage is creating conditions for an effective conversation. • It is necessary to equip a special place (a separate room or a specially fenced off space). It is better to arrange the furniture so that the principle “on equal terms”, “eye to eye” is observed: two identical chairs separated by a coffee table (1.5 m from each other); dim lighting is preferable. There should also be a hanger and a mirror. • Preliminary agreement on a meeting • Preparing the teacher for the conversation: prepare diagnostic results, drawings, applique work, manual labor, the child’s notebook; audio and video recordings of observations of his activities. Technology (rules) of conversation. 1. Greeting. Goal: create a friendly environment. Meet the parent, show him to the room and offer to choose a convenient place. Before starting a conversation, you can joke, express your opinion about the weather, etc. If people have not met before, an official introduction takes place: “What is your name and patronymic? What do you want me to call you?” In further conversation, it is necessary to address the person by name each time. This creates conditions for individualizing contact, as if bringing people closer together. During the conversation, it is necessary to take into account the cultural and national characteristics of the person, his educational level. 2. Conversation. During the conversation, the teacher sits on a chair, leaning against the back, in a comfortable position, with his head slightly tilted forward. If the initiator of the conversation is a teacher, then he begins his message with positive feedback about the child, then moves on to the goal and subject of the conversation. To better understand your interlocutor, it is recommended that you carefully but discreetly watch him and adapt to his posture and rate of speech.

It is useful to learn to use positive “open” gestures to successfully communicate with people and get rid of gestures that have a negative connotation. This will help you feel comfortable around people and make you attractive to them. The teacher must show empathy in conversation (empathy is entering into the spiritual world of another person), which helps to more objectively assess the situation and understand it. During the conversation, simple, accessible language is used, preferably without evaluative phrases (happened, worried, happened, etc.) and without scientific terms. It is very important to be able to pause so that the interlocutor can understand his experience and comprehend what was said. If you listen to your interlocutor “correctly”, then his negative experiences weaken, he begins to talk more and more about himself and, as a result, he himself “advances” in solving his problem. When answering a question from your interlocutor, it is sometimes useful to repeat how you understood what happened and to “label” his feelings. These communication skills are based on humanistic principles: respect for the personality of the interlocutor, recognition of his right to his own desires, feelings, mistakes, attention to his concerns. During the dialogue, feedback technology is used (repetition and generalization of what was said). This allows a person to understand how the interlocutor perceives him. The following introductory phrases are used: - Did I understand you correctly? - If I'm wrong, correct me. Parents have the right to disagree with the teacher. If the teacher feels such resistance, he will thus give up the desire to reorient the interlocutor and show his desire to admit that he is right in some way. You should not be afraid of parents’ negative attitude towards the results of the conversation. The main thing is to arouse their interest, feelings and understanding of the subject of conversation. Further joint work will help achieve a single positive solution. 3. End of the conversation. At the end of the conversation, you can compliment your interlocutor: “You know how to understand the situation,” making it clear that the conversation was successful. You can recommend meeting with a specialist, reading the necessary literature, inviting you to observe a child in kindergarten (“Workshop of Good Deeds”, open classes). It is advisable to arrange a second meeting. If the conversation drags on, you can look at your watch and stop the conversation with the phrase: “But this moment requires special attention. We'll talk about it next time. Today our time ends. Thank you for coming." After this, stand up and accompany your interlocutor to the door.

Parents must be confident that the teacher will treat their child well. In order to earn the trust of parents, a teacher can organize his interaction with them as follows (V.A. Petrovsky). Stage 1 – “Broadcasting a positive image of the child to parents.” The teacher never complains about the child, even if he has done something. Stage 2 – “Transmission to parents of knowledge about the child that they could not obtain in the family.” The teacher reports on the successes and characteristics of the child’s development in the preschool educational institution, the characteristics of his communication with other children, the results of educational activities, sociometric data, etc. At the same time, the principle “your child is the best” is observed. Stage 3 – “Familiarization of the teacher with family problems in raising a child.” At this stage, the active role belongs to the parents; the teacher only maintains the dialogue without making value judgments. Stage 4 – “Joint research and formation of the child’s personality.” Only at this stage can a teacher, who has gained the trust of parents by successfully carrying out the previous stages, begin to carefully give advice to parents.

Questions for analysis after a conversation with parents

1. What is the purpose of the meeting in terms of its pedagogical significance for parents 2. How successful was the organization of the meeting: the stages of its implementation, the methods used to activate parents, arousing their response, interest, etc. 3. Analyze your style of communication with parents during the meeting. Was it the same throughout the entire meeting or not? Was your communication with your parents dialogic in nature or reduced to your monologue? 4. What difficulties did you encounter during the meeting? Did they not depend on you or did your own actions lead to them? What helped or hindered you in coping with them? 5. Describe the emotional side of the meeting (general emotional atmosphere, elements of humor, “entertainment,” ease, etc.)

Holidays or culture of our ancestors shape Human qualities

Immediately, with a luxurious program, library staff came to our kindergarten for the holiday “Peter and Fevronia - Day of Love and Family.” We came with the folklore ensemble “Tagil Evenings”.

The evening was very interesting and active: first there was an informational part, which discussed the history of the national holiday. Next was the creative part: there were conversations and entertaining activities on the topic of their family, children together with their parents drew, guessed riddles and puzzles.

Afterwards, everyone went out to the central platform to dance in circles: mothers, fathers, grandmothers, grandfathers. And then they played Russian folk games. The polyphony of the Russian folk ensemble enchanted the entire neighborhood, people from the residential area began to flock to the kindergarten, and it turned out to be a real folk festival.

Everything was completely unusual, not standard. The next day in kindergarten there was only talk about what an extraordinary holiday it was yesterday. Parents met each other in locker rooms, on stairwells and shared their impressions: “Did you see yesterday’s holiday?” After all, parents from other groups came to this holiday quite by accident: it was evening, time to pick up their children from kindergarten.

We can talk about the life of our large family for a very long time, these are just a few moments, not taking into account routine everyday affairs: hectic preparations for the holidays, joint creative work, building snow figures on the site, baking cakes and much, much more.

And the cherished dream or general task “How to make a child happy?” can be simply rephrased in other words: how to make ourselves happy, because our happiness depends on whether our children are happy. Isn't that right?

And there is only one way to solve this problem: the formation of human character qualities in a child; the higher the character qualities, the more favorable fate will be to him.

Consultation for teachers “How can a teacher communicate with parents of preschool children without conflicts”

Letova Natalya Alexandrovna

Consultation for teachers “How can a teacher communicate with parents of preschool children without conflicts”

Municipal budgetary preschool educational institution

kindergarten "Kolosok"

Smolensk district, Smolensk region

How can a teacher communicate with parents of preschoolers without conflicts?

Consultation for teachers

Educator : Letova N.A.

2021

Communication between the teacher and the parents of the students .

The interaction of teachers of preschool educational institutions with parents has always been a pressing problem. has long been a common phrase in teaching circles: “It’s not as difficult to work with children as it is to communicate with their parents .” Almost every teacher has plenty of examples of how difficult it can be to achieve mutual understanding with parents .

Observing modern parents , we will highlight three categories of parents :

Indifferent parents (trying to quickly hand over the child to the teacher in the morning and also pick up in the evening). For example: “In the morning, mothers and fathers bring their children to kindergarten and politely say: “Hello!”

- and leave. The children spend the whole day in kindergarten: playing, walking, studying.
And in the evening the parents come and say: “Goodbye!”
, take the kids home.
Teachers and parents do not communicate , do not discuss the children’s successes and the difficulties they experience, do not find out how the child lives, what interests him, pleases him, upsets him. And if questions suddenly arise, then parents can say that there was a survey and we talked about everything there. And the teachers will answer them like this : “After all, there are information stands.
Read it, it says it all!” . Agree, the picture turned out to be bleak.

The second category is parents in conflict (constantly finding reasons to sort things out and make claims). Such parents , for the most part, complain that they cannot receive specific advice about the child’s development, and what they consider to be an indifferent attitude towards children. For example: “ The teacher’s disinterest in my child ”

, “
The teacher doesn’t hear what I tell him about my child.” Such parents find any reason for conflict .
The third category of parents do not understand at all why it is necessary to raise a child . They believe that the computer and TV will replace everything, communication, training, and education . But in reality they are deeply mistaken.

Special difficulties also arise in communicating with young parents and with parents from disadvantaged families. They often treat teachers condescendingly and dismissively; it is difficult to establish contact with them, establish cooperation, and become partners in the common cause of raising a child .

for a teacher to know the structure, communication styles, and be able to find a way out of conflict situations . In teaching practice, communication is the most important factor in professional success. Therefore, one of the most important tasks of modern education is to establish partnerships with parents . They assume a high level of mutual trust and the ability to organize a constructive dialogue and determine ways to effectively help children. Without partnership, even the most qualified teacher using the most modern methods will not achieve much success.

Who plays the leading role in organizing communication? Of course to the teacher . To build it, it is important to have communication skills, navigate the problems of education and the needs of the family , and be aware of the latest achievements of science. The teacher must make parents feel competent and interested in the successful development of the child, show parents that he sees them as partners and like-minded people.

Parents should see in the teacher a person who loves their child and be sure of a good attitude towards him. Lives by caring for him. This causes them to be frank, they talk confidentially about their difficulties, and ask for advice.

Therefore, it is important for the teacher :

establish contact with parents , understand them, empathize with them;

anticipate the results of communication;

manage your behavior;

show flexibility in communicating with parents ;

master etiquette norms of speech and behavior;

realize your own mistakes and difficulties in time;

recognizes the leading role of parents in raising children and the role of the teacher as their “assistant”

;

be able to plan upcoming communication: select the necessary information, traditional and non-traditional forms of organizing communication and methods of activating parents ;

have developed communication skills.

Sample code of communication:

Always strive to be in a good mood and be pleasant to talk to.

Try to feel the emotional state of the parents .

parents something positive about their child every time parents over .

Give parents the opportunity to speak without interrupting them.

Be emotionally balanced when communicating with parents , set an example of good manners and tact .

In a difficult situation, try to set an example of compliance - this cannot damage your dignity, but you can strengthen it.

Conflicts between parents and teachers in kindergarten.

The reasons can be both objective and subjective.

Objective reasons are the teacher’s dishonest attitude towards work . The best way out of the situation is to take the child and find another kindergarten.

Subjective reasons take place both on the part of educators and on the part of parents . These include unjustifiably positive or unjustifiably negative emotions from the kindergarten.

Unjustifiably positive emotions arise if parents are convinced that kindergarten will teach the child everything. If these expectations are not met, then tension arises between educators and parents . It is important to understand that kindergarten does a lot for the development of children. But he cannot replace the child's parents and their educational influence .

An unjustifiably negative attitude towards kindergarten arises when parents themselves have not attended a preschool institution , but have heard a lot of bad things about it.

Another subjective reason for conflicts in kindergarten is that for many parents the teacher is a symbol of power who teaches them. When a teacher gives recommendations to parents , they believe that the teacher is evaluating them . This is a misconception that leads to misunderstanding and conflict .

What can most often become a reason for misunderstanding and dissatisfaction?

From the parents' side it is :

• little work is done with the child in the garden;

• do not create the proper conditions for strengthening his health, little (or too much)

walk, do not ventilate or ventilate the group too often,

dress (warmly)

• cannot find an approach to the child;

• use non-pedagogical methods towards the child (moral and physical punishment)

;

• they don’t look after the child well (they didn’t wipe his sniffles, didn’t immediately change his panties, didn’t change his dirty T-shirt);

• the child is forced to eat or, conversely, they do not make sure that he eats everything;

• restrict the child’s freedom (one mother complained to me that her child was forced to lie in his crib during quiet time; she thought that teachers should just play with the child since he did not want to sleep);

• often punish and complain about the child if his behavior does not suit the teachers ;

• do not take action against hyperactive and aggressive children, especially if their child has been bitten (which often happens in nurseries, hit, scratched.

Of course, teachers also have “their own list”

complaints against
parents :
• they treat the kindergarten staff with disrespect, they can reprimand them in a raised voice in front of the child;

• forget to pay receipts or pay fees for additional classes on time;

• they forget to put a change of clothes in the children’s locker;

• children are brought to kindergarten completely unprepared (without basic self-care skills, not accustomed to the kindergarten’s daily routine);

• children are picked up late;

they raise children poorly (they pamper them excessively or, conversely, do not pay enough attention to the child; usually it is very difficult to find an approach to such children);

• make unreasonable claims to staff, find fault with little things.

The most effective way to resolve conflicts between educator and parent is good work by the educator . If he really works with the soul, is passionate about it, “is on fire”

at work, his
parents forgive him a lot . Such a teacher , as a rule, does not have conflicts . However, in most cases, conflicts still occur.
But they can be minimized! To educators :

inform parents of what will happen in kindergarten and group, not only in terms of schedules and routines, but also in terms of relationships and pedagogical influences .

show parents how “painless”

resolve
conflicts if they arise. In addition to the parental agreement, you can create a special memo that will spell out the rules of behavior in a conflict situation .
competently convey information to parents . For example, when reporting something negative about a child, always start with a positive review and only then formulate the problem.

the teacher’s use of various forms and methods in working with parents (conversations and consultations with a psychologist , questionnaires, open days and much more).

Parents:

Parents , first of all, need to remember that kindergarten is not a substitute for parental education .

Parents must understand that the behavior of a child who enters kindergarten changes dramatically.

Parents should also learn to convey information to educators in a non-conflict form .

The problem of conflict between parents and teachers is a global problem of society as a whole, the education system itself. There are also many subjective reasons that, even with a very good teacher and a wonderful kindergarten structure, give rise to difficult relationships. But, fortunately, most parents and educators understand that the only correct and best way out is not continuous confrontation or passive inaction, but serious and thoughtful cooperation. Listening to each other and acting together is not easy work , but it is fully rewarded by the harmonious development and happiness of our children.

Principles of interaction with parents

1. Friendly style of communication between teachers and parents :

A positive attitude towards communication is the solid foundation on which all the work of group teachers with parents . In communication between a teacher and parents, categoricality and a demanding tone are inappropriate. After all, any model of interaction with the family perfectly built by the kindergarten administration will remain a “model on paper”

, if
the teacher does not develop for himself specific forms of correct treatment of parents . The teacher communicates with parents every day , and it depends on him what the family’s attitude towards the kindergarten as a whole will be. Daily friendly interaction between teachers and parents means much more than a single well-executed event.
2.Individual approach:

It is necessary not only when working with children, but also when working with parents . The teacher , when communicating with parents , must feel the situation, the mood of mom or dad. This is where the teacher’s human and pedagogical ability to reassure the parent , sympathize and think together about how to help the child in a given situation comes in handy.

3. Collaboration, not mentoring:

Modern mothers and fathers, for the most part, are literate, knowledgeable people and, of course, well aware of how they should raise their own children. Therefore, the position of instruction and simple propaganda of pedagogical knowledge today is unlikely to bring positive results. It will be much more effective to create an atmosphere of mutual assistance and support for the family in difficult pedagogical situations , to demonstrate the interest of the kindergarten staff in understanding the family’s problems and a sincere desire to help.

4. We prepare seriously:

Any event, even the smallest one, to work with parents must be carefully and seriously prepared. The main thing in this work is the quality, not the quantity of individual, unrelated events. A weak, poorly prepared parent meeting or seminar can negatively impact the positive image of the institution as a whole.

5.Dynamism:

A kindergarten today should be in development mode, not functioning, be a mobile system, and quickly respond to changes in the social composition of parents , their educational needs and educational requests . Depending on this, the forms and directions of work of the kindergarten with the family should change.

The conclusion is clear: need to constantly work in communicating with parents